Saturday, December 31, 2011
Friday, December 30, 2011
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Pooing progress
Yesterday was her 4th day in a row of pooing in the potty. We probably at least partially have the Once Upon A Potty video to thank for it. I got it from the library and she loved it and watched it again and again when she was sick.
On the 3rd day, she pooed and peed in the potty! (She said "just like Prudence!" from the video)
She always wants to sit in front of her coffee table or train table and play with apps on her iphone or toys on the table at the same time while she sits on the potty.
On the 3rd day, she pooed and peed in the potty! (She said "just like Prudence!" from the video)
She always wants to sit in front of her coffee table or train table and play with apps on her iphone or toys on the table at the same time while she sits on the potty.
Mickey's magic choo choo train
We got this Mickey train from Toygaroo this month. It comes with a Mickey figure. Josh played with it and put Mickey and the Little People mommy ("Little mommy") in the locomotive and a horse in the carriage. She wanted to sleep with the Mickey, mommy, and horse the first 2 nights, which I'm not a fan of since they are hard plastic. Every time I snuck them away, she would notice and insist they come back to bed. She fell asleep holding Mickey. Then the 3rd night, she suddenly said "Mickey mouse sleeps on the train table. Little mommy's OK." So she fell asleep with the little mommy in her hand. :)
Everything tastes better when it's purple (long overdue post)
Last summer, at the farmers mkt, sierra walked up to a potato stand, asked me what all the colored potatoes were, and then said she wanted the purple potatoes. I bought them and since then, she has been eating potatoes (previously, she wouldn't eat potatoes). Another time, she saw a purple cauliflower, pointed at it, and said she wanted it. I made it for lunch that day and she ate a LOT (half a head or more!) Note that it tastes just like white cauliflower, except it is PURPLE. We saw some honey sticks last weekend in different flavors. One was purple (grape) and she wanted it. I bought it, but we have not tried it yet. I am not sure if this will get her to finally eat honey.
Monday, December 26, 2011
Saturday, December 24, 2011
Thursday, December 22, 2011
She calls herself "she"
As in "she wants seaweed!"
But she is learning to call herself "I", as in
"I want to take a bath now."
But she is learning to call herself "I", as in
"I want to take a bath now."
Oh my goodness!
Sierra loooooooooves holiday lights.
Last year, she would say "Woooow" in a wondrous tone of voice. We went to Christmas tree lane last year in Palo Alto, and as soon as we parked the car and opened the door, she saw all the lights outside and said "Wooooow".
This year, our neighbor 5 housesdown has this major light extravaganza (so much so they have power issues, he said) that she LOVES. She always wants us to drive by their house before we pull into our driveway (and they are a little past where we are coming from so we have to pass our house and U-turn back haha)
They have a gingerbread house they made that is just jam-packed with lights. It was very creative - they took and old Little Tikes playhouse and painted it brown and put giant painted candy all over it. Then they strung icicle lights and wrapped colorful lights in the candy shapes... ANYWAY, Ra-ra always wants to look out our bathroom window, where you can see the colors from the lights through the trees.
This year, instead of "Wooooow", the operative word (or words) are "Oh my goodness!" When we drive at night, she is on the LOOKOUT. When she sees a holiday lights display, she exclaims "Oh my Goodness! Daddy that way, she wants to see it!" Hahaha.
This year, when she was really sick, I asked Josh to bring home a small Christmas tree for her since it would really lift her spirits. (Last year, our nanny brought her tabletop musical one over and she loved it.)
She loves it and every night now (oddly, something that Josh seems to want to make a tradition) before bed, she asks to sit on the couch and sing Christmas songs with the lights off and the tree lit.
Last year, she would say "Woooow" in a wondrous tone of voice. We went to Christmas tree lane last year in Palo Alto, and as soon as we parked the car and opened the door, she saw all the lights outside and said "Wooooow".
This year, our neighbor 5 housesdown has this major light extravaganza (so much so they have power issues, he said) that she LOVES. She always wants us to drive by their house before we pull into our driveway (and they are a little past where we are coming from so we have to pass our house and U-turn back haha)
They have a gingerbread house they made that is just jam-packed with lights. It was very creative - they took and old Little Tikes playhouse and painted it brown and put giant painted candy all over it. Then they strung icicle lights and wrapped colorful lights in the candy shapes... ANYWAY, Ra-ra always wants to look out our bathroom window, where you can see the colors from the lights through the trees.
This year, instead of "Wooooow", the operative word (or words) are "Oh my goodness!" When we drive at night, she is on the LOOKOUT. When she sees a holiday lights display, she exclaims "Oh my Goodness! Daddy that way, she wants to see it!" Hahaha.
This year, when she was really sick, I asked Josh to bring home a small Christmas tree for her since it would really lift her spirits. (Last year, our nanny brought her tabletop musical one over and she loved it.)
She loves it and every night now (oddly, something that Josh seems to want to make a tradition) before bed, she asks to sit on the couch and sing Christmas songs with the lights off and the tree lit.
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
2nd ER visit
Last night, Sierra tripped over Josh's leg and fell backwards right onto the corner baseboard (molding between wall and floor). It punctured her in the middle of the back of her head and started bleeding immediately. (The ER tech said the scalp has lots of capillaries so bleeds a lot.) She cried a lot but stopped within 10 minutes or so. She talked about how she fell in mommy's room and hit her head.
We went to the ER and they used special glue to glue it shut. (Thankfully did not need staples - which is what they use on the head instead of stitches)!
Sierra was such a good girl as they cleaned and glued her wound. At first we sang christmas songs and then I told Josh to give her her iphone to play with her games. She didn't wince or even appear to notice! Then when the doctor (actually, a physician's assistant) left, she waved and said "bye bye"
Much better than last time. It was an Asian woman who was good with kids, which helped.
Added 1/9/2012:
The next day, Ayi came and she pointed out where she hit her head to Ayi. (She was off by 1 foot, but I corrected her.) Since then, she will tell you about the incident if you ask. "I fell in mommy's room and got an owie. I tripped over Daddy's legs." She told the pediatrician in Berkeley (whom we saw for a rash) this when I asked the dr to do a quick check on if it was healing last Wednesday. She is very serious (and cute) when she talks about it.
We went to the ER and they used special glue to glue it shut. (Thankfully did not need staples - which is what they use on the head instead of stitches)!
Sierra was such a good girl as they cleaned and glued her wound. At first we sang christmas songs and then I told Josh to give her her iphone to play with her games. She didn't wince or even appear to notice! Then when the doctor (actually, a physician's assistant) left, she waved and said "bye bye"
Much better than last time. It was an Asian woman who was good with kids, which helped.
Added 1/9/2012:
The next day, Ayi came and she pointed out where she hit her head to Ayi. (She was off by 1 foot, but I corrected her.) Since then, she will tell you about the incident if you ask. "I fell in mommy's room and got an owie. I tripped over Daddy's legs." She told the pediatrician in Berkeley (whom we saw for a rash) this when I asked the dr to do a quick check on if it was healing last Wednesday. She is very serious (and cute) when she talks about it.
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
SHE's singing Happy Hanukkah!
In these pictures (the blocks and gingerbread house below), we said "Smile!" and she grins and says "eeeee". It's so cute. I think she learned this from Sophia when she was here for her (belated) b-day playdate. There will be more smiling pictures on this blog now - as opposed to candid shots!
In this picture, she leaned towards the menorah and posed for the camera. I think she knows how to pose for the camera now! And then immediately after she heard the click noise, she ran towards the camera to look at the picture (as always!)
These pictures were taken shortly before her head puncture wound. :(
Role play
Ra ra loves role play these days. Last Sunday, she was pretending to drive to Gilroy Gardens in the little tikes car outside. She parked the car and said "We're here!" (like we do when we really park the car.) Then we pretended to ride all the rides. We rode the boat ride by pushing the little toy boats around in her sand box. We walked in a circle going up and down to pretend we were riding the merry go round. I asked about the car ride and she suggested going back in the little tikes car to pretend she was in the car rdie. We pretended the slide was the ferris wheel. She loved it.
That night, we pretended in bed. She sat up in bed and pretended to fasten her seatbelt and drive the car. She then decided to pretend drive to everyone's house - Sophia, Sklya, Jaden, Robbie, etc. She would get out of the car, ring the doorbell, say hello, and then say ok time to go to the next kid's house!
That night, we pretended in bed. She sat up in bed and pretended to fasten her seatbelt and drive the car. She then decided to pretend drive to everyone's house - Sophia, Sklya, Jaden, Robbie, etc. She would get out of the car, ring the doorbell, say hello, and then say ok time to go to the next kid's house!
Little thespian
Sierra really enjoys role play these days. Recently, when doing our usual Skyla-prune juice ritual, I said, "Daddy will pretend to be Skyla and Ra-ra will pretend to be Skyla's mommy." (Even though I think she wanted to be Skyla, Josh thought it would be better to have her role play Skyla's mommy.) I feel like the director of a play. :) See below...
Night 1:
J: Can I have some prune juice?
S: OK
J: Mmm, that was good. Can I have more prune juice?
S: OK
Me: Ra-ra, you're supposed to say 'No more prune juice'
S: No more prune juice
J: Hai yao! (lies on floor & kicks legs)
Me: Josh, you're supposed to say 'Hai yao prune juice!'
J: Hai yao prune juice!
S: No
S: Do you want some putaotao, apples, or cucumbers?
Me: Ra-ra, don't forget to say "Ignore her!"
S: What's ignore her mean? (Sierra knows what it means but ALWAYS likes to hear my explanation. :) )
Me: It means don't look at her, don't listen to her, don't talk to her.
S: Ignore her!
Last night:
J: Can I have some prune juice?
S: OK
J: Mmm, that was good. Can I have more prune juice?
S: No
J: Hai yao prune juice!
S: No
S: Gran gran says 'Do you want some putaotao, apples, or cucumbers?'
Me: Ra-ra, Gran gran says that. Ok, I'll be gran gran. Don't forget to say 'Ignore her.'
S: What's ignore her mean?
Me: It means don't look at her, don't listen to her, don't talk to her.
S: Ignore her!
Me: Ok, I'm gran gran. Do you want some putaotao, apples, or cucumbers?
J: Okay. (stops tantrum)
Night 1:
J: Can I have some prune juice?
S: OK
J: Mmm, that was good. Can I have more prune juice?
S: OK
Me: Ra-ra, you're supposed to say 'No more prune juice'
S: No more prune juice
J: Hai yao! (lies on floor & kicks legs)
Me: Josh, you're supposed to say 'Hai yao prune juice!'
J: Hai yao prune juice!
S: No
S: Do you want some putaotao, apples, or cucumbers?
Me: Ra-ra, don't forget to say "Ignore her!"
S: What's ignore her mean? (Sierra knows what it means but ALWAYS likes to hear my explanation. :) )
Me: It means don't look at her, don't listen to her, don't talk to her.
S: Ignore her!
Last night:
J: Can I have some prune juice?
S: OK
J: Mmm, that was good. Can I have more prune juice?
S: No
J: Hai yao prune juice!
S: No
S: Gran gran says 'Do you want some putaotao, apples, or cucumbers?'
Me: Ra-ra, Gran gran says that. Ok, I'll be gran gran. Don't forget to say 'Ignore her.'
S: What's ignore her mean?
Me: It means don't look at her, don't listen to her, don't talk to her.
S: Ignore her!
Me: Ok, I'm gran gran. Do you want some putaotao, apples, or cucumbers?
J: Okay. (stops tantrum)
Monday, December 19, 2011
Hai yao mushrooms!
I've put mushrooms in Sierra's food since she was a baby and she was always fine with it. Hard to know if she specially liked mushrooms since it was mixed in.
A month ago, I was eating mushroom pizza. I didn't want to give her the crust since were trying her on a wheat free diet to see if it improved her suspected allergy, but she wanted some. So I gave her a mushroom slice. She said "hai yao mushroom!" And I gave her another one... And another one and another one. And she ate a whole bunch!
Then tonight I got pasta primavera from Frankie Johnny and Luigi's. There were a bunch of small whole mushrooms in it. She kept wanting to eat more of them.
A month ago, I was eating mushroom pizza. I didn't want to give her the crust since were trying her on a wheat free diet to see if it improved her suspected allergy, but she wanted some. So I gave her a mushroom slice. She said "hai yao mushroom!" And I gave her another one... And another one and another one. And she ate a whole bunch!
Then tonight I got pasta primavera from Frankie Johnny and Luigi's. There were a bunch of small whole mushrooms in it. She kept wanting to eat more of them.
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Sophia's Ra-ra
This weekend, she made up a new game. Josh was Sophia's Daddy, I was Sophia's Mommy, and SHE was Sophia's Ra-ra. In other words, I think she was Sophia, but if you think about it, it makes sense that she considered herself Sophia's Ra-ra.
The rest of the time, she kept asking me "What's Sophia's Ra-ra doing?" (similar to 'What's Silly Sue doing?' which she really enjoyed a couple months(?) ago). She also would ask "What's Sophia's Mommy doing?" referring to me. I'd then tell her what she and I were doing. If I said "Mommy's eating apples," she would correct me and say "Sophia's Mommy is eating apples." haha!
The rest of the time, she kept asking me "What's Sophia's Ra-ra doing?" (similar to 'What's Silly Sue doing?' which she really enjoyed a couple months(?) ago). She also would ask "What's Sophia's Mommy doing?" referring to me. I'd then tell her what she and I were doing. If I said "Mommy's eating apples," she would correct me and say "Sophia's Mommy is eating apples." haha!
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Friday, December 16, 2011
Mini me
Ra ra is becoming a Mini Me of daddy.
First thing she does each morning is get out of bed, toddle to the desk, unplug her iphone (an older version that josh no longer uses that has games and music for her on it), and open a game app (such as Talking Tom, one of her faves). She does this so systemically. Like getting up to go pee in the morning. It looks just like daddy!
I've admittedly become very lax with screentime with her ever since her series of illnesses starting in September. Now that she's 2, officially, the AAP says limited screentime is OK, as Kim has told me, so that's another excuse.
First thing she does each morning is get out of bed, toddle to the desk, unplug her iphone (an older version that josh no longer uses that has games and music for her on it), and open a game app (such as Talking Tom, one of her faves). She does this so systemically. Like getting up to go pee in the morning. It looks just like daddy!
I've admittedly become very lax with screentime with her ever since her series of illnesses starting in September. Now that she's 2, officially, the AAP says limited screentime is OK, as Kim has told me, so that's another excuse.
Mini me
Ra ra is becoming a Mini Me of daddy.
First thing she does each morning is get out of bed, toddle to the desk, unplug her iphone (an older version that josh no longer uses that has games and music for her on it), and open a game app (such as Talking Tom, one of her faves).
I've admittedly become very lax with screentime with her ever since her series of illnesses starting in September. Now that she's 2, officially, the AAP says limited screentime is OK, as Kim has told me, so that's another excuse.
First thing she does each morning is get out of bed, toddle to the desk, unplug her iphone (an older version that josh no longer uses that has games and music for her on it), and open a game app (such as Talking Tom, one of her faves).
I've admittedly become very lax with screentime with her ever since her series of illnesses starting in September. Now that she's 2, officially, the AAP says limited screentime is OK, as Kim has told me, so that's another excuse.
Magazine games
Sierra really enjoys leafing through magazines (such as Ikea and Pottery Barn Kids).
One of her favorite games is to go to the office chairs page of the Ikea catalog, where there is a 2 page spread of different chairs, including a pink one! I'll ask her, "Where does Ra ra sit?" and ask about where different people sit. She really enjoys this! Josh pointed out that she never picks the same chair, so everyone gets their own chair. Interesting observation! I just took that for granted (as an adult). And of course, Ra ra always sits in the pink chair. :) She likes doing this with the 2 page spread of various tractors in her tractor book too, which I think I may have blogged about awhile back.
One of her favorite games is to go to the office chairs page of the Ikea catalog, where there is a 2 page spread of different chairs, including a pink one! I'll ask her, "Where does Ra ra sit?" and ask about where different people sit. She really enjoys this! Josh pointed out that she never picks the same chair, so everyone gets their own chair. Interesting observation! I just took that for granted (as an adult). And of course, Ra ra always sits in the pink chair. :) She likes doing this with the 2 page spread of various tractors in her tractor book too, which I think I may have blogged about awhile back.
"Haiyao prune juice!"
Ra ra gets the biggest kick watching other toddlers throw temper tantrums.
Months ago, at her chinese play group at Skyla's house, she watched Skyla throw a temper tantrum because she wanted another cup of prune juice.
Skyla said "Haiyao prune juice!" and lay on the floor kicking her legs. Her mom said "No, you only get 1 cup of prune juice" and said "Everyone, ignore Skyla." Gran gran, who was with her when this happened, said Sierra watched this whole thing with a big grin on her face. Then Gran gran said, "How about some grapes, cucumbers, or apples, Skyla?" And Skyla said, "OK" and the tantrum ended.
Every night, Sierra asks me to "Talk about Skyla's house." and she means to tell her about the prune juice incident. Sierra will act it out and kick her legs on her bed, smiling. Sierra likes to jump in and say gran gran's line: "how about putao-tao (grapes), cucumbers, or pinguo (apples)?" Then Sierra will ask "What does ignore mean?" And I'll answer, "It means don't listen to her, don't talk to her, don't pay any attention to her, don't look at her, close your eyes." And Ra-ra will say "Close your eyes" and close her eyes.
Last night, daddy lay on the ground and kicked his legs and she was laughing!
The other day, Sierra was starting to throw a tantrum when she wanted to watch another youtube video. I said "Ok, ignore Ra-ra! Don't look at her, don't talk to her" and walked away. Then she stopped!
More recently, over Thanksgiving, Sierra had the pleasure of watching Robbie throw a tantrum over wanting more than 1 ball. Tobi had a new 3-pack of balls: red, yellow, and green. (Sierra has helpfully reminded me which colors there were. The girl is extremely observant!) She only wanted to give Robbie 1 ball and he was crying because he wanted more. After trying to explain that he only gets 1 ball and Robbie being upset for awhile, Tobi said "how about these bubbles?" to distract him. And he was happy with the bubbles and forgot about the balls.
After we got home, Sierra had me recount this incident. I completely forgot about the bubbles distraction part. After I told her about it, she said "and then Auntie Tobi said, 'how about bubbles?' and Robbie said 'ok'". Hahaha. Sierra knows what we adults do to try & distract! Needless to say, she's asked me to "Talk about Robbie's house" at night ever since then too!
Speaking of distractions as a technique for dealing with temper tantrums, Ayi said the reason Ra ra is so hard, is because she can't be distracted! Other kids are easy to distract, but not Ra ra. She is obviously very aware of distraction as a tool, as she is very observant about how other toddlers can be distracted away from something they want.
Correction added 12/21: the balls were red, green, and blue, Sierra corrected me.
Months ago, at her chinese play group at Skyla's house, she watched Skyla throw a temper tantrum because she wanted another cup of prune juice.
Skyla said "Haiyao prune juice!" and lay on the floor kicking her legs. Her mom said "No, you only get 1 cup of prune juice" and said "Everyone, ignore Skyla." Gran gran, who was with her when this happened, said Sierra watched this whole thing with a big grin on her face. Then Gran gran said, "How about some grapes, cucumbers, or apples, Skyla?" And Skyla said, "OK" and the tantrum ended.
Every night, Sierra asks me to "Talk about Skyla's house." and she means to tell her about the prune juice incident. Sierra will act it out and kick her legs on her bed, smiling. Sierra likes to jump in and say gran gran's line: "how about putao-tao (grapes), cucumbers, or pinguo (apples)?" Then Sierra will ask "What does ignore mean?" And I'll answer, "It means don't listen to her, don't talk to her, don't pay any attention to her, don't look at her, close your eyes." And Ra-ra will say "Close your eyes" and close her eyes.
Last night, daddy lay on the ground and kicked his legs and she was laughing!
The other day, Sierra was starting to throw a tantrum when she wanted to watch another youtube video. I said "Ok, ignore Ra-ra! Don't look at her, don't talk to her" and walked away. Then she stopped!
More recently, over Thanksgiving, Sierra had the pleasure of watching Robbie throw a tantrum over wanting more than 1 ball. Tobi had a new 3-pack of balls: red, yellow, and green. (Sierra has helpfully reminded me which colors there were. The girl is extremely observant!) She only wanted to give Robbie 1 ball and he was crying because he wanted more. After trying to explain that he only gets 1 ball and Robbie being upset for awhile, Tobi said "how about these bubbles?" to distract him. And he was happy with the bubbles and forgot about the balls.
After we got home, Sierra had me recount this incident. I completely forgot about the bubbles distraction part. After I told her about it, she said "and then Auntie Tobi said, 'how about bubbles?' and Robbie said 'ok'". Hahaha. Sierra knows what we adults do to try & distract! Needless to say, she's asked me to "Talk about Robbie's house" at night ever since then too!
Speaking of distractions as a technique for dealing with temper tantrums, Ayi said the reason Ra ra is so hard, is because she can't be distracted! Other kids are easy to distract, but not Ra ra. She is obviously very aware of distraction as a tool, as she is very observant about how other toddlers can be distracted away from something they want.
Correction added 12/21: the balls were red, green, and blue, Sierra corrected me.
Smart Ra ra
It's better to have a nanny take care of older kids because they can tell you when the nanny is doing something wrong.
Today, Sierra went for a walk with Ayi. After they got back, Ayi took out her water bottle to give her. Sierra immediately said in Chinese that it was dropped on the ground and dirty so she didn't want to drink it. Ayi thought she could get away with it, but Ra ra knew better!
Today, Sierra went for a walk with Ayi. After they got back, Ayi took out her water bottle to give her. Sierra immediately said in Chinese that it was dropped on the ground and dirty so she didn't want to drink it. Ayi thought she could get away with it, but Ra ra knew better!
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
How Sierra wakes up
There was a brief period when Sierra would wake up from her naps happily and play with the toys in her bed. That was in September 2010. But since then, she wakes up cranky and wanting to be held. And she always says "haiyao" (more) as she cries awake. I'm not sure why!
Just now she woke up and cried, half asleep, "buyao zheige" (I don't want this). Probably a dream.
Just now she woke up and cried, half asleep, "buyao zheige" (I don't want this). Probably a dream.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Little translator!
Tonight, Daddy walked down the hallway, where Sierra was sitting at her table coloring with Gran gran. He said, "I'm going to 99 Ranch to buy pork soon." Ra-ra looked up and turned to Gran gran and said, "Daddy qu 99 Ranch mai rou song."
Josh was astounded. Her dual language ability never ceases to amaze us!
Josh was astounded. Her dual language ability never ceases to amaze us!
Understanding consequences
One night when we were forcing down her antibiotics, she spit it all back out. Twice. We gave up. That night, she didn't get a present. And when Josh asked why she didn't get a present, she said "because... didn't eat yao yao" (yao is medicine in Chinese. In Chinese baby talk you repeat the last syllable of a word, like pu tao tao for grapes)
Drawing progression
Sierra used to draw scribbles, but I recently noticed she can draw nice little circles now. And she enjoys drawing them on all her pages.
I drew a Christmas tree and she enjoyed drawing different colored balls on it. She keeps asking me to draw Christmas trees now. :)
A drawing game I made up a long time ago that she enjoyed (and still enjoys) is when I draw an owl on the magnadoodle pad. She then picks up the circle magnet and stamps the eyes. She used to stamp them on the ears, and then all over the place, but now she stamps them where the eyes actually go (and then all over the place - the girl loves stamping!)
I drew a Christmas tree and she enjoyed drawing different colored balls on it. She keeps asking me to draw Christmas trees now. :)
A drawing game I made up a long time ago that she enjoyed (and still enjoys) is when I draw an owl on the magnadoodle pad. She then picks up the circle magnet and stamps the eyes. She used to stamp them on the ears, and then all over the place, but now she stamps them where the eyes actually go (and then all over the place - the girl loves stamping!)
Monday, December 5, 2011
Sierra is sick again
Notes for Dr. Fong visit 12/1/2011
9/27 – Nasal congestion. No other symptoms.
10/31 – Runny nose, thick mucus.
11/10 – Amoxicillin for 9 days.
11/19 – Finished Amoxicillin, No more runny nose. But congestion continued.
11/28 – Runny nose, coughing.
11/29, 11/30, 12/1 – Fever up to 104F.
Dr. Fong said she had an ear infection in her right ear again (same or different?) and also tonsilitis (pus in her throat, which we also wondered if it was the saltines she ate in the car). He prescribed a broader spectrum antibiotic (cefdinir) than last time since it might be that the amoxicilin didn't kill it last time. I thought we should have had a follow up last time to see if the ear infection was clear so that way you know if the next ear infection is the same or not. He just said if the symptoms are gone, they don't re-check. However, she never had ear infection symptoms to begin with. She only had bad congestion last time. And that did go away, or at least return to the congestion level she had before (which we suspect is allergy) from late September.
This time, it was worse. She had a fever and finally on Friday, the fever was gone, but she was still fussy. On Friday, the congestion was worse and also her tonsils/adenoids were probably swollen since she was having sleep apnea - gasping for breath at night in between not breathing. It was awful to listen to. Even holding her up as with normal nasal congestion, did not help, as she still gasped for breath. Gran watched her every night while I ran in as needed. She slept during the morning to make up a little.
She can't nurse to sleep like she usually does for her naps. Even though it's still comforting, the poor girl can't fall asleep since it's so hard to breathe. We couldn't get her to nap Fri or Sat - we took her for a car ride both days and she was so tired and upset in the car. Friday I finally nursed her to sleep at 5pm and she was down for the night (fitfully waking up). It was awful since we had to wake her for the antibiotics (once daily instead of 2x daily like last time). Saturday the same thing happened, except this time she woke at 7pm and had a light dinner. Sunday, Josh held her to nap.
Last night (Sunday night), Gran held her upright in her lap from 3am-7am and she was able to sleep. 4 HOURS. But at least she was able to breathe. Before, even if you held her upright, she gasped for air.
Dr. Fong said she had an ear infection in her right ear again (same or different?) and also tonsilitis (pus in her throat, which we also wondered if it was the saltines she ate in the car). He prescribed a broader spectrum antibiotic (cefdinir) than last time since it might be that the amoxicilin didn't kill it last time. I thought we should have had a follow up last time to see if the ear infection was clear so that way you know if the next ear infection is the same or not. He just said if the symptoms are gone, they don't re-check. However, she never had ear infection symptoms to begin with. She only had bad congestion last time. And that did go away, or at least return to the congestion level she had before (which we suspect is allergy) from late September.
This time, it was worse. She had a fever and finally on Friday, the fever was gone, but she was still fussy. On Friday, the congestion was worse and also her tonsils/adenoids were probably swollen since she was having sleep apnea - gasping for breath at night in between not breathing. It was awful to listen to. Even holding her up as with normal nasal congestion, did not help, as she still gasped for breath. Gran watched her every night while I ran in as needed. She slept during the morning to make up a little.
She can't nurse to sleep like she usually does for her naps. Even though it's still comforting, the poor girl can't fall asleep since it's so hard to breathe. We couldn't get her to nap Fri or Sat - we took her for a car ride both days and she was so tired and upset in the car. Friday I finally nursed her to sleep at 5pm and she was down for the night (fitfully waking up). It was awful since we had to wake her for the antibiotics (once daily instead of 2x daily like last time). Saturday the same thing happened, except this time she woke at 7pm and had a light dinner. Sunday, Josh held her to nap.
Last night (Sunday night), Gran held her upright in her lap from 3am-7am and she was able to sleep. 4 HOURS. But at least she was able to breathe. Before, even if you held her upright, she gasped for air.
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Hardest baby
----- Forwarded Message -----
From: gran
To: josh
Cc: clover
Sent: Saturday, December 3, 2011 2:59 PM
Subject: for the record
This I-Yee said yesterday, Rara is the hardest baby (when sick) that she ever met. However, her other babies never got too sick
I-Yee also said before, Rara is the hardest baby to trick or switch attention (when not sick), therefore, makes it harder for care taker. She told her family she can watch any baby after Rara.
From: gran
To: josh
Cc: clover
Sent: Saturday, December 3, 2011 2:59 PM
Subject: for the record
This I-Yee said yesterday, Rara is the hardest baby (when sick) that she ever met. However, her other babies never got too sick
I-Yee also said before, Rara is the hardest baby to trick or switch attention (when not sick), therefore, makes it harder for care taker. She told her family she can watch any baby after Rara.
Saturday, November 26, 2011
Friday, November 25, 2011
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Daddy talk Chinese
We haven't played the Chinese game in a long time. Yesterday, I was asking her how to say different words in Chinese and she was having fun. Of course, Josh joined in very soon. He loves quizzing her, being all Tiger Dad and everything.
She thought it was a great game though and kept saying "Daddy talk Chinese" or "Play the Chinese game" to get him to do more. Her Chinese vocabulary is much bigger than her English vocab. So for some words, we would say the English word, she would say "I don't know" and I would tell her the Chinese word, and she would say oh! So it was like an English lesson for her. :)
She thought it was a great game though and kept saying "Daddy talk Chinese" or "Play the Chinese game" to get him to do more. Her Chinese vocabulary is much bigger than her English vocab. So for some words, we would say the English word, she would say "I don't know" and I would tell her the Chinese word, and she would say oh! So it was like an English lesson for her. :)
Sunday, November 20, 2011
SHE drew Mountains and Wildflowers
Josh noticed that her drawing looks like our Mt. Rainier picture, and it really does! Note Josh's picture is sideways. (Ignore the happy face, which I drew.) But when I asked her what she was drawing at the time, she said "mommy" and something else.
Here's the Mt. Rainier Picture:
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Happy face!
Sierra started getting into looking for happy faces in everything a month or two ago. She loves it when I make a happy face with cheerios (just 2 eyes and 1 mouth) when spooning her cereal.
Ra ra likes tomato!
I was eating a sandwich today and Ra ra wanted to try some. It had tomato in it. I left a tomato slice (I think it was half) on her tray and then when I next noticed, it was gone! I asked if she ate it and she "yeah" and smiled and I gave her more pieces and she ate them too! :)
This is exciting bc she never wanted to eat tomato before!
This is exciting bc she never wanted to eat tomato before!
Friday, November 11, 2011
Happy 11-11-11 Sierra!
Edited 11-22-2011 (catch up since it's been so busy)
Ken sent us an email saying happy 11-11-11 and I didn't even realize the numbers were all 1! Happy 2nd birthday, little sweet & precious Ra ra! We love you!!!
Ra ra was sick on her 2nd birthday. It was just gran, ayi, and me. Ayi brought over a red envelope. Ra ra knew it was her birthday and asked for a balloon. Gran went out and brought her a big bunch of balloons including a hello kitty balloon from party city. When gran walked in the door, Ra ra said "wow!" - she was so surprised! She held the bunch of balloons and bent her knees up and down dancing to "happy birthday" as we sung it. It was very sweet. Then she asked "Where's the cake?" So gran gran went to 99 Ranch and got her a peach cake. She enjoyed putting in the candles herself. After josh got home, we lit the candles and sang happy birthday. She then blew them out (with my help blowing). She knew to blow! I guess it's from books.
It's been an all around bad few weeks...
-environmental allergies since 9/27 (thought it was cold at first). Sierra just started having congestion when lying down (more noticeably) sleeping. Gran first noticed it when she napped on 9/27. We saw the dr. on 10/7. He said it might be a slow virus, just hope she doesn't get another virus or it could become bacterial with all the mucus up there. It was slowly getting better, but then...
-had shrimp on Saturday 10/29, got hives for 8 days. We had dinner at Jaden's house. They served "fish jiaozi" and his mom kept saying it was the same restaurant as last time. But Josh heard Jaden's grandma say later it was "seafood jiaozi" and later Norm said it was from a different restaurant (Everyday Beijing), which made sense since I didn't recall the chives in it last time. And there was shrimp in it.
-caught a cold (started sneezing 10/29 evening with the hives and then runny nose next day and heavy runny nose, congestion, cough after that) from Josh that he got in NYC (returned 10/27). (Josh admits that he overwore himself out despite my asking him to stay healthy and take care of himself since we didn't want Sierra to get sick.)
-cold + bad allergy = really bad symptoms, which led to...
-ear infection (dr. saw lots of pus in ear, and said it's definitely an ear infection, but we didn't notice her bothered by the ear or tugging at all. who knows.)
-likely sinus infection (dr. said the antibiotics for the ear infection should treat the sinus infection too. though sinus infection usually has longer than a 10 day course)
-gave away Naya on 11/4, who has reunited with her sister in a child-free home. She will be much happier, though we are sadder.
So she was on antibiotics for 10 days for the first time. :( The congestion did start to get better within 1-2 days of starting the antibiotics.
10/29 on our way home from Jaden's after dinner, I called the advice nurse about the hives, who said the official recommendation is to go to the ER. We went to the ER and sat outside in the car until about 9:45pm, then went home. Keeping her up late was probably not good for recovery. :(
We took Sierra to the ER the night of 10/30 Sunday, because she woke up coughing and what I thought was wheezing from the shrimp allergy. I later learned that any serious wheezing from the allergy would have been in the first 24 hours. We ended up keeping her out late that night until midnight, which probably did not help her get better. Sigh. It wasn't wheezing, but a bad cough. :(
At the ER, the nurse forced in some Benadryl while we all held her down. It was awful, and she didn't want to drink anything the whole night with all the crying, which probably did not help healing. If Sierra was better about taking medicine, we could have given her Benadryl at home and avoided the ER trip.
Poor Sierra was up many nights itching and heavily congested and coughing. It was awful.
Sierra was a trooper with the antibiotics. Gran learned from watching the ER nurse how to force down medicine. While I cradled her, Josh or the nanny hold her legs down, and my mom squeezes it down the side of her inside cheek while she screams. Gran got her a musical merry go round from CVS that we played for her while taking it.
We developed a ritual of playing the merry go round, getting a present afterwards along with snacks (two or more of: "pearly shells" (TJs veggie chips), TJs cheese puffs, TJs french fry puffs, snap pea crisps, oatmeal animal cookies, grapes, apple).
She would ask if it was medicine time, and then would get on the couch and get ready. She told me where the put the presents (which I wrapped). She would always scream and cry so hard during the medicine. Then afterwards, she would immediately get up, say "bye bye merry go round" and then turn to the present.
We did a makeup small b-day celebration on Saturday 11/19 when Sophia came over. Sophia was sick and then Ra ra was sick, so we hadn't seen her in awhile! Gran bought cupcakes and I wrapped another present.
We were so busy that I didn't have time to get her any b-day gifts. Josh stopped at Cheeky Monkey toys the night before and got her a Green toys tea set (which she loves) and an Asian Baby Stella). I later got her some toys that we are slowly giving to her now.
Note that hives are irritated when she cries/screams and also when she takes a bath (warm water) so we avoided a bath for a few days and dressed her lightly. The hives waxed and waned for 8 days, appearing at different places, slowly getting fewer. They would often get worse towards the end of the day, I guess bc the body temp is going up. Having no experience with hives, this was totally new to me. Each night, we applied benadryl cream to the hives. She also got eczema (dry scaly patches on her legs and some on her arms), which is a common allergic reaction. We put aquafor on that.
Gran was a hero and devoting as ever. I also caught Josh's virus and coughing (started the night of the ER) and so was Josh. We were coughing at night and didn't want to wake Sierra. So Gran slept with Sierra every night, propping up her head and held her when she woke up so plugged up and coughing and itching. I went in a couple times to hold her up in my arms too until I started having coughing fits (thanks josh).
A lesson for the future is to sleep her in her carseat so she is upright, at least during naps. I started to do that more recently, leaning her carseat against the wall, and I think it helped. It might have helped prevent the bacterial infection. We did prop up her mattress, but she would slide down and also, it's not as good as being upright.
She missed trick or treating with her halloween bag she made (see earlier post) :( bc she was too sick that night. She was going to be a cat butterfly (catterfly?) (we already had cat ears from last year and purple wings that gran had bought her awhile back for fun).
Ken sent us an email saying happy 11-11-11 and I didn't even realize the numbers were all 1! Happy 2nd birthday, little sweet & precious Ra ra! We love you!!!
Ra ra was sick on her 2nd birthday. It was just gran, ayi, and me. Ayi brought over a red envelope. Ra ra knew it was her birthday and asked for a balloon. Gran went out and brought her a big bunch of balloons including a hello kitty balloon from party city. When gran walked in the door, Ra ra said "wow!" - she was so surprised! She held the bunch of balloons and bent her knees up and down dancing to "happy birthday" as we sung it. It was very sweet. Then she asked "Where's the cake?" So gran gran went to 99 Ranch and got her a peach cake. She enjoyed putting in the candles herself. After josh got home, we lit the candles and sang happy birthday. She then blew them out (with my help blowing). She knew to blow! I guess it's from books.
It's been an all around bad few weeks...
-environmental allergies since 9/27 (thought it was cold at first). Sierra just started having congestion when lying down (more noticeably) sleeping. Gran first noticed it when she napped on 9/27. We saw the dr. on 10/7. He said it might be a slow virus, just hope she doesn't get another virus or it could become bacterial with all the mucus up there. It was slowly getting better, but then...
-had shrimp on Saturday 10/29, got hives for 8 days. We had dinner at Jaden's house. They served "fish jiaozi" and his mom kept saying it was the same restaurant as last time. But Josh heard Jaden's grandma say later it was "seafood jiaozi" and later Norm said it was from a different restaurant (Everyday Beijing), which made sense since I didn't recall the chives in it last time. And there was shrimp in it.
-caught a cold (started sneezing 10/29 evening with the hives and then runny nose next day and heavy runny nose, congestion, cough after that) from Josh that he got in NYC (returned 10/27). (Josh admits that he overwore himself out despite my asking him to stay healthy and take care of himself since we didn't want Sierra to get sick.)
-cold + bad allergy = really bad symptoms, which led to...
-ear infection (dr. saw lots of pus in ear, and said it's definitely an ear infection, but we didn't notice her bothered by the ear or tugging at all. who knows.)
-likely sinus infection (dr. said the antibiotics for the ear infection should treat the sinus infection too. though sinus infection usually has longer than a 10 day course)
-gave away Naya on 11/4, who has reunited with her sister in a child-free home. She will be much happier, though we are sadder.
So she was on antibiotics for 10 days for the first time. :( The congestion did start to get better within 1-2 days of starting the antibiotics.
10/29 on our way home from Jaden's after dinner, I called the advice nurse about the hives, who said the official recommendation is to go to the ER. We went to the ER and sat outside in the car until about 9:45pm, then went home. Keeping her up late was probably not good for recovery. :(
We took Sierra to the ER the night of 10/30 Sunday, because she woke up coughing and what I thought was wheezing from the shrimp allergy. I later learned that any serious wheezing from the allergy would have been in the first 24 hours. We ended up keeping her out late that night until midnight, which probably did not help her get better. Sigh. It wasn't wheezing, but a bad cough. :(
At the ER, the nurse forced in some Benadryl while we all held her down. It was awful, and she didn't want to drink anything the whole night with all the crying, which probably did not help healing. If Sierra was better about taking medicine, we could have given her Benadryl at home and avoided the ER trip.
Poor Sierra was up many nights itching and heavily congested and coughing. It was awful.
Sierra was a trooper with the antibiotics. Gran learned from watching the ER nurse how to force down medicine. While I cradled her, Josh or the nanny hold her legs down, and my mom squeezes it down the side of her inside cheek while she screams. Gran got her a musical merry go round from CVS that we played for her while taking it.
We developed a ritual of playing the merry go round, getting a present afterwards along with snacks (two or more of: "pearly shells" (TJs veggie chips), TJs cheese puffs, TJs french fry puffs, snap pea crisps, oatmeal animal cookies, grapes, apple).
She would ask if it was medicine time, and then would get on the couch and get ready. She told me where the put the presents (which I wrapped). She would always scream and cry so hard during the medicine. Then afterwards, she would immediately get up, say "bye bye merry go round" and then turn to the present.
We did a makeup small b-day celebration on Saturday 11/19 when Sophia came over. Sophia was sick and then Ra ra was sick, so we hadn't seen her in awhile! Gran bought cupcakes and I wrapped another present.
We were so busy that I didn't have time to get her any b-day gifts. Josh stopped at Cheeky Monkey toys the night before and got her a Green toys tea set (which she loves) and an Asian Baby Stella). I later got her some toys that we are slowly giving to her now.
Note that hives are irritated when she cries/screams and also when she takes a bath (warm water) so we avoided a bath for a few days and dressed her lightly. The hives waxed and waned for 8 days, appearing at different places, slowly getting fewer. They would often get worse towards the end of the day, I guess bc the body temp is going up. Having no experience with hives, this was totally new to me. Each night, we applied benadryl cream to the hives. She also got eczema (dry scaly patches on her legs and some on her arms), which is a common allergic reaction. We put aquafor on that.
Gran was a hero and devoting as ever. I also caught Josh's virus and coughing (started the night of the ER) and so was Josh. We were coughing at night and didn't want to wake Sierra. So Gran slept with Sierra every night, propping up her head and held her when she woke up so plugged up and coughing and itching. I went in a couple times to hold her up in my arms too until I started having coughing fits (thanks josh).
A lesson for the future is to sleep her in her carseat so she is upright, at least during naps. I started to do that more recently, leaning her carseat against the wall, and I think it helped. It might have helped prevent the bacterial infection. We did prop up her mattress, but she would slide down and also, it's not as good as being upright.
She missed trick or treating with her halloween bag she made (see earlier post) :( bc she was too sick that night. She was going to be a cat butterfly (catterfly?) (we already had cat ears from last year and purple wings that gran had bought her awhile back for fun).
Sunday, November 6, 2011
SHE's storytime with Gran-Gran
She loves this book "Sunshine" that we got from Sidney for her 2nd b-day. There are no words nor are they needed. The illustrations wonderfully tell the story. She made up her own name for the book - the "Eating book".
Friday, November 4, 2011
SHE's being daddy
She told us she was being daddy and climbed into his couch and got the remote and lay there. hahaha.
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Monday, October 24, 2011
Grandma's guest post
----- Forwarded Message -----
From: Linda Elman
To: Clover Huang; Joshua Elman
Cc: Don Elman
Sent: Sunday, October 23, 2011 3:13 PM
Subject: Great Visit with Sierra
We had a great time with Sierra yesterday. She's growing into quite the charmer. We loved dancing with her and especially watching her collapse over and over when the song came to "all tired out.". Equally fun was having her prepare us food in her kitchen. She definitely gets the idea of pretend.
Perhaps the most special time was when she was coloring and asking us to write words to accompany her drawings. We wrote Grandma and Grampa, Mommy, Daddy, Sierra, Gran Gran, etc., and then poo, which she was glad to illustrate. Four year old humor in a not quite two year old?
Amazing, although we know she is bilingual, and sang some Chinese songs, she only spoke to us in English. She continues to charm and amaze us,
Love Mom & Dad
Linda L. Elman
Data Made Friendly
Sent from my iPad--excuse the typos--fat fingers
From: Linda Elman
To: Clover Huang
Cc: Don Elman
Sent: Sunday, October 23, 2011 3:13 PM
Subject: Great Visit with Sierra
We had a great time with Sierra yesterday. She's growing into quite the charmer. We loved dancing with her and especially watching her collapse over and over when the song came to "all tired out.". Equally fun was having her prepare us food in her kitchen. She definitely gets the idea of pretend.
Perhaps the most special time was when she was coloring and asking us to write words to accompany her drawings. We wrote Grandma and Grampa, Mommy, Daddy, Sierra, Gran Gran, etc., and then poo, which she was glad to illustrate. Four year old humor in a not quite two year old?
Amazing, although we know she is bilingual, and sang some Chinese songs, she only spoke to us in English. She continues to charm and amaze us,
Love Mom & Dad
Linda L. Elman
Data Made Friendly
Sent from my iPad--excuse the typos--fat fingers
Sunday, October 23, 2011
"Ra-ra is shy"
Last night, I was shocked to hear Sierra suddenly repeat, "Ra ra is shy" again and again as she was falling asleep. Josh heard it too and immediately said, "No, Ra ra is not shy. Ra ra is friendly." (Side note to Josh: "Friendly" isn't the opposite of shy.) We were both surprised that she picked up on it from Grandma's visit. (She heard Grandma saying it at Robbie's house Thursday because she was quiet in front of Robbie and on Saturday when she first arrived and was quiet. The second time, I immediately said "don't call her s-h-y" but she immediately picked up on the context.)
This led me to finally research articles on shyness in toddlers. First off, Sierra doesn't have one of the main symptoms and that is averting her eyes. She actually stares at everyone and is extremely observant. We already know Sierra is extremely observant because she notices EVERYTHING. When we get back from somewhere, she'll point out details that I didn't even notice. For instance, the time we came back from Tobi's house BBQ and Sierra pointed out what color her T-shirt was.
Anyway, Sierra has been more quiet when first joining large groups/class starting about 1 month ago. Before that, she was quiet, but would go around more. Now, she is always the last kid to pick up the instruments. She is definitely being extremely observant though.
The most salient point in all the articles is NEVER label the child as "shy", which creates a self-fulfilling prophecy. I know this one because I experienced it first hand growing up.
The What to expect series on toddlers gave the best summary. The first 3 points really hit home:
1. Avoid labels. Call him "shy" and you risk creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. He'll start to internalize the label and may even use it to avoid situations he finds uncomfortable ("I'm shy, so I don't have to try to fit in").
I read another article that said, "If you must call her something, call her something positive," such as, in Sierra's case, "observant," which I believe she is more than shy.
2. Don't show disapproval or embarrassment. The slightest hint that you consider toddler shyness a character flaw of his will cause him to withdraw more. So don't praise outgoing kids by comparing their behavior to his, and don't force him to answer questions from other adults. If the cat's got his tongue, you can help by filling in the silence. ("Derek is three now. Isn't that right?")
Both gran (disapproval) and Josh (embarassment) are guilty of #2, but for different reasons. Months ago, even before Sierra started being observant/shy in large groups, a waiter asked Sierra how old she was. Josh jumped in and said "Don't be shy!" because he was embarassed she didn't know the answer (which she didn't - she was barely old enough to speak at that age). Why a waiter would embarass Josh is also weird. He's just a teenage kid, who cares? Although Josh is Jewish, he definitely doesn't have the self-confidence you would think. I feel like I have to keep reminding Josh of this one because for whatever reason, it's his springboard reflex to say "shy" everytime someone approaches Sierra.
3. Select playmates with care. Don't force your tot to socialize, but do encourage him to interact with other kids by starting small. Plan one-on-one dates or small playgroups with kids he feels comfortable with (maybe neighbors or cousins) and who are definitely laid-back (not aggressive or overly loud). He may actually find it easier to hang out with playmates who are a little younger than he ("Hey, I'm the big boy here!") or a year or two older if he likes following someone else's lead.
This is interesting because we were wondering if it's better to have older playmates (who have better verbal skills for her) and more aggressive playmates (so she can get used to the real world). We've always had small playgroups (for germ reasons). Now we know what is best for her at her age.
Articles from prominent websites that I found compelling:
Baby Center:
Don't label your child as shy.
It's best not to speak about your child's timidity with others in his presence. He may hear "He's shy" as a criticism or "He's just shy" as an excuse that sets him apart from others. Instead, try saying "He is observant." Try not to always think of your child as shy, either. If you expect shyness, your expectation may influence his behavior.
Dr. Sears:
Never label a child "shy." On hearing this a child feels something's wrong with her, and this will make her feel more shy. If you must use words to describe your child use words like "observant." These are nicer and more accurate terms. Labels also affect the way others treat your child. Calling her "shy" can make them over solicitous, as though there is something they should do to "help" or fix it. If you are going to visit Aunt Nancy and you want your quiet child to make a good first impression, avoid the temptation to say, "Don't be so shy, Aunt Nancy won't bite." That's guaranteed to make him clam up. The already self-conscious child is likely to become even more shy. Tell the child ahead of time what's expected of him, a simple "hi" and quiet, polite behavior. Don't ask more than you can reasonably expect. Keep the attention off the child, and as he gets comfortable, trust that Aunt Nancy will come to appreciate him. Encourage your child to bring along one of her favorite activities (for example, art supplies or a board game) that Aunt Nancy can use as a bridge to communication.
The main lesson that I personally find really compelling is: "Do not label your child as shy." I personally experienced this growing up and I definitely felt that it caused me to become more shy and/or maintain my shyness instead of grow out of it. It's true that you live up to your labels and expectations.
This led me to finally research articles on shyness in toddlers. First off, Sierra doesn't have one of the main symptoms and that is averting her eyes. She actually stares at everyone and is extremely observant. We already know Sierra is extremely observant because she notices EVERYTHING. When we get back from somewhere, she'll point out details that I didn't even notice. For instance, the time we came back from Tobi's house BBQ and Sierra pointed out what color her T-shirt was.
Anyway, Sierra has been more quiet when first joining large groups/class starting about 1 month ago. Before that, she was quiet, but would go around more. Now, she is always the last kid to pick up the instruments. She is definitely being extremely observant though.
The most salient point in all the articles is NEVER label the child as "shy", which creates a self-fulfilling prophecy. I know this one because I experienced it first hand growing up.
The What to expect series on toddlers gave the best summary. The first 3 points really hit home:
1. Avoid labels. Call him "shy" and you risk creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. He'll start to internalize the label and may even use it to avoid situations he finds uncomfortable ("I'm shy, so I don't have to try to fit in").
I read another article that said, "If you must call her something, call her something positive," such as, in Sierra's case, "observant," which I believe she is more than shy.
2. Don't show disapproval or embarrassment. The slightest hint that you consider toddler shyness a character flaw of his will cause him to withdraw more. So don't praise outgoing kids by comparing their behavior to his, and don't force him to answer questions from other adults. If the cat's got his tongue, you can help by filling in the silence. ("Derek is three now. Isn't that right?")
Both gran (disapproval) and Josh (embarassment) are guilty of #2, but for different reasons. Months ago, even before Sierra started being observant/shy in large groups, a waiter asked Sierra how old she was. Josh jumped in and said "Don't be shy!" because he was embarassed she didn't know the answer (which she didn't - she was barely old enough to speak at that age). Why a waiter would embarass Josh is also weird. He's just a teenage kid, who cares? Although Josh is Jewish, he definitely doesn't have the self-confidence you would think. I feel like I have to keep reminding Josh of this one because for whatever reason, it's his springboard reflex to say "shy" everytime someone approaches Sierra.
3. Select playmates with care. Don't force your tot to socialize, but do encourage him to interact with other kids by starting small. Plan one-on-one dates or small playgroups with kids he feels comfortable with (maybe neighbors or cousins) and who are definitely laid-back (not aggressive or overly loud). He may actually find it easier to hang out with playmates who are a little younger than he ("Hey, I'm the big boy here!") or a year or two older if he likes following someone else's lead.
This is interesting because we were wondering if it's better to have older playmates (who have better verbal skills for her) and more aggressive playmates (so she can get used to the real world). We've always had small playgroups (for germ reasons). Now we know what is best for her at her age.
Articles from prominent websites that I found compelling:
Baby Center:
Don't label your child as shy.
It's best not to speak about your child's timidity with others in his presence. He may hear "He's shy" as a criticism or "He's just shy" as an excuse that sets him apart from others. Instead, try saying "He is observant." Try not to always think of your child as shy, either. If you expect shyness, your expectation may influence his behavior.
Dr. Sears:
Never label a child "shy." On hearing this a child feels something's wrong with her, and this will make her feel more shy. If you must use words to describe your child use words like "observant." These are nicer and more accurate terms. Labels also affect the way others treat your child. Calling her "shy" can make them over solicitous, as though there is something they should do to "help" or fix it. If you are going to visit Aunt Nancy and you want your quiet child to make a good first impression, avoid the temptation to say, "Don't be so shy, Aunt Nancy won't bite." That's guaranteed to make him clam up. The already self-conscious child is likely to become even more shy. Tell the child ahead of time what's expected of him, a simple "hi" and quiet, polite behavior. Don't ask more than you can reasonably expect. Keep the attention off the child, and as he gets comfortable, trust that Aunt Nancy will come to appreciate him. Encourage your child to bring along one of her favorite activities (for example, art supplies or a board game) that Aunt Nancy can use as a bridge to communication.
The main lesson that I personally find really compelling is: "Do not label your child as shy." I personally experienced this growing up and I definitely felt that it caused me to become more shy and/or maintain my shyness instead of grow out of it. It's true that you live up to your labels and expectations.
Saturday, October 22, 2011
SHE's with Grandma and Grandpa and Robbie
[from daddy]
Grandma and Grandpa came to visit Sierra today after spending a few days taking care of Robbie to celebrate Robbie's parent's anniversary. Grandma and Grandpa brought over bagels for breakfast, read to Sierra, played with bears, and we all played outside for a while. After lunch, we took a walk to get Sierra an ice cream cone (no ice cream!) at Baskin Robbins and everyone else got some ice cream.
SHE's sliding with Robbie
SHE's in her house
SHE's going to get an ice cream cone
Grandma and Grandpa came to visit Sierra today after spending a few days taking care of Robbie to celebrate Robbie's parent's anniversary. Grandma and Grandpa brought over bagels for breakfast, read to Sierra, played with bears, and we all played outside for a while. After lunch, we took a walk to get Sierra an ice cream cone (no ice cream!) at Baskin Robbins and everyone else got some ice cream.
SHE's sliding with Robbie
SHE's in her house
SHE's going to get an ice cream cone
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)